Monday, November 10, 2008

Isn't Part of the Couple's Club

I'm okay with hanging out with couples, I'm use to it, but some couples make me want to puke!
I can't stand when couples decide to hang out with each other just because they are couples, not necessarily because they have anything in common with one another other than the fact that they are married. Last night I tried to hang out with some new couple friends because I wanted to get to know them more. I thought that maybe we would invite some other people to chill with as well. Wellllll, cool couple number one invited pukey clingy couple number two, annnnd they invited single neutral guy to come hang out with us as well. So I really wanted to get to know cool wife but unfortunately clingy wife got to sit beside her and I didn't get to talk to her all night! I was totally bumbed! I ended up talking with husbands which was fine until I asked clingy huband some questions.

A: So M how is life?
M: Life is great.
A: Why is it great?
M: Well work is really great and welllll I'm married.

I wanted to hurl!!!!! I seriously just wanted to punch him in the face! Or as my room-mate suggested cut off his wedding finger.
These two couples have been spending time together while I've been busy with school, I don't think I'll ever get to know cool couple better:(. When am I going to have time to have a social life? I really wanted to get to know cool wife because I felt like we had a lot in common but now I feel like that opportunity is lost.


RTF said...

Totally hilarious post, Ade.

kat said...

agreed. to tom and to you

Anonymous said...

I know (knew) how you feel. I used to feel the same way. Wondering how I could get to know that cool girl (who was married...I hung out with more of the opposite sex than the same sex so at the time that fact would have compounded on the complicated scenario). So anyway, I always felt like an outcast while hanging out with couples. In your case you've got it even easier because it's not like the husband would (hopefully not) feel threatened by the potential of you stealing his wife away from him. I'd say (as a married dude with a still attached wedding finger), don't even bother trying to hang out with couples unless you are with a partner yourself. It's not worth the potential awkwardness and humiliation that can come with it. It's like this one time that Chris Nelson was in this small group full of couples. He was the only single person there....and also the most vocal. It was really weird listening to him talk about relationships from a single perspective to a group that was no longer single. As superficial as you may see couples that get together for that commonality only, you might find that this commonality can be incredibly crucial. But not for the obvious reasons. When Steph first moved here with me, I knew everyone and she know no one. The most effective way for her to get to know people at the time was for us to find couples that none of us knew before hand, and essentially get "couple" friends that we both related to. Most of these were newly married at the time (now divorced) but with that commonality alone we were able to forge new relationships.

So here's my advice. Screw hanging out with couples. Leave that world alone. Instead, invite the married girl that you want to get to know, out just the two of you, to hang out.

That's my two cents. Don't cut off my finger.


Anonymous said...

No response? Wow...gettin' the cold shoulder because I am a cog in the wheel :-)



Adrienne said...

Dave, I don't always respond to everyone who posts on here. I see your point, but I don't think you see mine.
I'm tired of not having time or money to spend with other people. I was just annoyed by the dude's comment because he had no clue how ethnocentric his comment was about his being married. It was like he was saying "ya, my life is better than yours because I'm married." Its like saying to someone with no legs "ya, my life is great because I have legs." How ignorant is that!?! That guys life could be just as great even though he has no legs.
In one sense your saying I should only hang out with people one on one because I'm single. Thats whacked, I know you don't really think that but thats pretty much what you just said.
Good enough response?