Saturday, December 29, 2007
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Sorry I don't know how to display videos properly.
If you have over 20 mins watch "How to be EMO" . The nerd dudes that made this video confused emo with straight edge.
If you have a less than ten minutes check out "What is Emo", their are emo boys all over the world.
"Boys wear girls trousers and tight shirts."
"Just a drop of goth tears"
Sunday, November 18, 2007
One slightly enebreated(I like this word) man told me I was pretty but ended it with girl, "pretty girl". Thus negating the pretty part all together by referring to me as a pretty GIRL. Not a pretty women.
I've been comtemplating my beauty a lot lately and I feel that being inundated by many adverts has distorted my understanding of beauty drastically(okay not just ads but many other things). I want to find my unique beauty for myself...... does any woman truly find this......does any human ever find this?
Am I pretty?
PS one day I want buy some random T-shirts and sponge on some random words I really like. Maybe I'll make a line and call them scrabble shirts? Now someone will steal my idea because I posted it on the WWW. Okay back to the dreaded paper.
Friday, November 16, 2007
They also dabble with film a little bit and have the mose hilarious music video's. The video I like the most is for Kountry Gentleman, the best part is the fight scene where they whip out combs and use them as pseudo switch blades to try and brush each others hair. Very Funny!
They have a fashion style reminiscent to a band a lot of my American friends use to like called Skillet(to the right). Skillet, consists of horrible poppy music that reminds me of drinking a can of pink crush when what I really want is a can of Vanilla Coke! Grosse! FF5 is definetly the Vanilla Coke I crave.
Friday, November 2, 2007
Usually he answers this question with "soon". But then I got angry with Him when he kept giving me that answer and it never happened "soon". I told him I didn't want to hear that answer anymore.
This time when I asked He answered with "Its not the right time". This answer still has me quite ansy but not as angry, its still an ambiguous answer for a concrete systematic human.
Oh God you are hilarious! I know its not the right time but....WHEN???????
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
He/they don't understand my innermost struggles and greatest desires.
He/they hear me but don't comprehend me.
He/they don't understand my desire for financial autonomy and the hell I have gone through to try and achieve it.
Me me me me me, I know its all about me. But I am a generous me and without the financial autonomy I can't be that side of me. I would rather spend on others than myself......kind of like my father. Sometimes I think we don't feel worthy or that its right to spend on ourselves.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Its hard to pin down because you know that 'apparently'they have the 'best' interests in their arguements for the improvement of others but then they begin to lecture and lecture and lecture..... And then you just want to punch them in the face.
Or they say snide insinuating remarks that are not affirming at all! Like ya I think next time you could do this better or next time can you do this instead of that. Or little belittleing comments that don't seem like much but then they begin to pile up and pile up and become this big mamoth red hot iron that brands the person(s) they are referring to as a slab of "your not that special to me" jargon. And I'm more interested in what you could be than what you are.
In our Christian culture we are always trying to improve ourselves or help others improve who they are. Well I suggest that we start AFFIRMING others more! Lets build them up instead of tearing them down.
I know that these Condescenders have insecurity issues with themselves and that is why they are the way that they are but it is still no excuse for such jevenile behaviour. Get over yourselves already! If only I could scream that at such a persons face.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Jamie lived behind my friends the Habiebes (they were from Iraq), one day while I was visiting the Habiebes I went over to his house to play. At the time he was playing a kissing game with some other girl and asked me if I wanted to play. I didn’t really say that I did but somehow he got the impression I wanted to. When it came time to kiss him I just kind of stood their deliberating about whether to do it or not and then he got the other girl to demonstrate for me how to do it. I relented and kissed him a couple times. The other little girl and I took turns kissing him. Jamie then wanted me to go a step further and French kiss him. I wasn’t too sure about how to do that so he explained that you put your tongue in the other persons mouth. I didn’t want to do it but Jamie got the other little girl to demonstrate for me. I tried but could not bring myself to do it. No matter how much Jamie tried to coax me to French kiss him I couldn’t do it.
And that is the story of my first kiss. I started young, it was more about curiosity than enjoyment.
Friday, August 3, 2007
This past weekend my cousin Brittany and I took our younger cousin Lukas from Germany to Canada's Wonderland. The night before we went for a walk and showed him the University of Guelph. On the way back we stopped at the park. I saw the swing set and started swinging on one of he swings. Brittany soon joined me and asked Lukas if he wanted to swing. He staunchly refused saying it was too childish. This coming from a boy who is 10 years younger than me.
As we swung I felt this bubble of laughter come out of the depths of my soul. A laughter I forgot I had because it was a long time since I had used it. Britt and I hooped and hollered as we pumped our legs to go higher and higher into the humid night air that surrounded us and tried to touch the full orange moon that looked down on us. Thier was something about swinging on swings and being around precious Brittany that reminded me once again who I am. I am the free spirited, brutally honest, laugh machine Adrienne and I love it! I guess sometimes you lose yourself and you just need someone who knows and cares for you to help you find it again. I hadn't realized the saddness that had so deeply enveloped me until that night. Mom and Joh had said they had sensed a saddness about me but I just thought they didn't know how to take my quiet disposition. I think what they really meant was that they hadn't heard my laughter in awhile.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
I think that I really suck at this whole friend thing. I don't think I know how to be a friend anymore or how to be social. Its so much easier to wrap myself up into a cacoon filled with layers of introversion than to try over and over again to form relationships. Nothing is for sure! NOTHING! Everything is disposable and can be replaced and apparently that includes me.
I hate Blogger! I have nothing to hate right now so today I will hate this piece of shit!
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Currently in the #1 spot is Dave Krasinski of the hit TV series The Office. I love the looks that he gives the mock cameras on the show. I think he is a cute innocent looking guy.....a guy I wouldn't mind spending a day with just hanging out with and driving around town aimlessly killing time. Your boy next door type of boy. I like how his character waits around for his co-worker to break it off with her dead beat fiance......Jim ya gotta be a little more bold (I'm still getting throught the second series. I'm on disc 2).
Oh my goodness I love a good o'l skinny goofy guy to make me laugh. These two guys remind me of two other guys I know that make me crack up. It is the fact that they can't keep a straight face for long before they start giggling like school girls. Jimmy Fallon and Topher Grace are the Hollywood versions of Caleb Teeple and Reg Lewickie.
Saturday, July 7, 2007
Friday, June 29, 2007
How about healthy chicks? What about girls that try to eat healthy and be active. Not those mutated fitness girls because that is not natural or healthy. Lets have women who are toned but still have some extra layers. Or women who are active but don't exercise until they cry.
Lets just be healthy!
Friday, June 22, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
This is my beautiful fiery friend Sarah. She is a talented artist who likes to make funky jewelry. I love her dearly and think that she is an incredible person.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Monday, May 21, 2007
Today he hugged me for no reason. I didn't flinch or pull away. It was a strong embrace. I liked it.
I sense his pleasure in me. Or am I just good o'l Adrienne....although I don't think I am.
So ask me out for Petes sake!
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Where do you go with your broken heart in tow
What do you do with the left over you
And how do you know, when to let go
Where does the good go, where does the good go
Look me in the eye and tell me you don't find me attractive
Look me in the heart and tell me you won't go
Look me in the eye and promise no love's like our love
Look me in the heart and unbreak broken, it won't happen
It's love that leaves and breaks the seal of always thinking you would be
Real, happy and healthy, strong and calm, where does the good go
Where does the good go
Where do you go when you're in love and the world knows
How do you live so happily while I am sad and broken down
What do you say it's up for grabs now that you're on your way down
Where does the good go, where does the good go
Monday, May 7, 2007
I hate this whole application process! No one is willing to expand on each step I must take except to lead me to more jargon I have to sort out and decifer. The reason I am going back to school is to be able to go to teachers college. I want to teach grade three....I think? I'm not 100% sure but I'm sure enough that I don't want to earn just above minimuim wage anymore. Lately I have one line going through my head which is 'I just want to kick somebodies ass!'. I have wondered why I have had that line running in my head but now as I am writing this post I think I know why. I feel like I have been cheated out of a hand of cards, as though I was tricked into spending lots of time and money on an education that didn't prep me for the reality of life.
People in third world countries barely get an elementary school education and yet we North Americans have two and three degrees worth of BS. Their is so much competition in our sphere of the earth for jobs that the bar gets set higher and higher unless.....you know someone who knows someone. Urrrggghhhh I just want to get my hands dirty and work in a decent career with a decent wage. Not one that forces me to be co-dependant on my parents. Sure min wage gets highered every year now but taxes get higher every year.
I think that jobs that require the most odd hours and dirtiest conditions should start getting wage increases. Those jobs are usually given to those who do not have the education to be in higher status positions.
Well I'm done my rant for now. Back to the tedious job of scrolling down pages and pages of uiversity shit that tells me something but nothing at the same time.
Sunday, May 6, 2007
I took a ton of pictures of Natalie and Barry's kids. They make the best looking babies ever! They are are the sweetest kids too!
Charity had a shin dig at her house last week. She made us really great food! The high light for me was the ice-cream cake! Yummmy!
Darryl stole baby Parker away from Natalie and I loved watching them together. He literally danced all around the house with the little man. Too cute!
I had to get a shot of Joe and Sarah's beautiful little bella Ella. She is sooo sweet!
I had planned to go to Ottawa, Kingston, Guelph and Hamilton a couple weeks ago but ended up only being able to go Guelph. I wanted to keep up my relationships with my friends but my car died and then we had a death in the family so I only got to go and see my old camp friends Josh and September. They have a new adition to they're family. His name is Judah and he is such a sweet little baby.
I loved watching September and Josh interact together. September looked exhausted from being up with the cutie pie. It was great to see how Josh would step in and carry Judah so that September could take a break. They have a great new house. I have no doubt that they will have a great marraige and a great family. Josh is one of those guys that is hard not to like. He accepts everyone for who they are. September is the same way. They both have the greatest laugh! They are perfect for each other!
I found this picture of Brittany and I from way back to the play back. I was five and Britt must have been 6 months. My parents and I drove from Ontario out to BC. I love this picture of us.
Pictures of Dad when he was cool. Key word being was! Dad had the emo/beat nick thing going on when he was a teenager. I especially like his checkered pants. I think I got my funky style of dressing from him. Oh and no the girl in the picture is not my mom. She is some girl who liked to hide behind her hair in every picture I found of them together.
Dad looks kinda dreamy on the motorcycle.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
1. Their will always be someone better than you. Do the best that you can because you'll be better than someone else.
2. Sale isn't another word for Buy. Don't buy it unless you need it in the future ie:soap.
3. Dance your heart out!
My female singer/song writer hero Leslie Feist
I will buy every singe one of her CDs!
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Last time I wrote I forgot to tell you something about my fast that I found interesting. At the beginning of my fast I felt pretty good about it but then i realized I began to get bored more easily because I wasn't spending/wasting my time on the internet or watching movies. To fill my time I found myself going out and buying little doo dads that I wanted. Nothing super expensive but I really don't have a lot of money to be spending it on stuff. It isn't my fault entirely that I like things. My parents like stuff, we are frugle but we buy small things ie: dad likes to buy mom knick knacks as gifts and mom is always buying melittle things like ugly key chains, smelly perfumes etc etc for me. When I was a little girl when ever my parents went away they would bring me something back that was some what frivolous and served no purpose except to spoil me. Some things I bought during Lent that I didn't really need but really wanted were 2 Italian scarves and curvey pilsner beer glasses. Although I didn't need them they sure are pretty!
I'd rather look like a fairy than a hooker. I think that those new patent leather shoes that are so trendy look like hooker shoes. Half those younge girls who wear them don't even know how to walk in them. Since when did tall and clumsy become hot? What about short and dainty? I would rather wear those hindi inspired ballerina slippers and look some what graceful.
My towns people in my little stuck in the mud home town have been complaining about one the churches in my town. This church would like to have a shelter for the local street people. They actually want to provide some sort of haven for the hopeless, something my town is not very good at. Well the nieghbors are not too happy about this since is will be bringing in some seedy characters.
What I don't get is that only a couple blocks away is a porn shop. It just opened last year and nobody except for my friend complained about it. I believe her exact words to the city council man who took her call were "Have You Ever Been Raped?!?". Oh Steph you are the greatest!!!!*
Think about it they are complaining about an organization that wants to better the town and then we have the other extreme with the porn shop! A business that encourages the degredation of humans into sex toys. Their is a reason why their is such thing as a sex addict. Boys and girls can you say the words Rapist - Pedophile. Oh small home town how you are the pain in my ass!
My friend and pastor Joe is always coming up with creative ways of advertising for our monthyly agendas. I'm not sure if this was Joe's or Nathan's idea but I think that it is pretty great! Definetly eye catching! Don't you think?
I am showing the movie Simon Birch to my Leaders in Training group and I must say it has some great one liners. Here are two one liners I really like! Tee-Hee
(As Simon and Joe get into the cold water in the Corey)
"My balls just turned into marbles" "My balls just turned into bee-bees"
"My balls just turned into marbles" " My balls just turned into raisins"
Things from the 80's I will never wear again and hope never come back in style:
1.Unitards 2.Jumpers 3.Overalls 4.Sack style dresses 5.Night Gowns 6.Yellow gold 7.Zip Up Pyjamas 8.Big ass Sunday hats 9.Jelly shoes 10.Acid wash denim 11.Skinny jeans 12.Scrunchies 13.French braids 14.Bicycle shorts 15.Joggin suits 16. Slouchy shirts with a knot on the side. 16.Plaid lumberjack shirts 17.Floral print sunday dresses 18.Vests! 19.Teased bangs in a swooping band to the side. 20.Hot pink lip-stick 21.Mustaches 22.Madonna style braziers 23.Splash paints 24.Fanny sacks 25.Hammer pants 26.Hight cut pants and skirts
Things fromt the 80's I will wear again:
1.Leg Warmers! 2.Tights 3.Polka Dots 4.Big-ass dangly earings 5.Things with modern style lace 5.Fourescent! 7.Bangles 8.Canvas deck shoes 9.Scarves 10.Pumps 11.Long knecklaces 12.Broaches 13.Fish nets 14.Leggings 15.Teal 16.Lunch pails with matching thermoses 17. Tams (french hat) 18. Angora (I hate bunnies, they stink, poop everywhere, chew anything, scratch). 19.Mauve 20. Peach
*Her house is just around the corner from it.
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
Lets see....surprisingly a lot of things have actually happened in my life.
1. I did the March break day camp at the Y, that took a good 3 weeks out of my life.
-I accidentally called one of the kid's mom grandma....."Joey say good bye to grandma" Ooops!
2. My grandma's husband died.
-As selfish as this sounds I feel like I have my grandma back after seven years. Her husband was not abusive just very egalitarian and ordered her around a lot. He liked his routine! My granny is very independant and to see her reduced to a servant angered me.
3. I went away on retreat to a convent in the Tdot.
-I met a man.....he was 95! Too cute! It was a beautiful day on the tuesday afternoon I sat down to pray on a bench and soon I see a figure in the distance slowly chugging my way. Well eventually that figure approached me on the bench and asked me for a seat. I was kind of ticked by the interuption but gently reminded myself that this could be an encounter arranged by God. His ailment..... loneliness. His name is Oscar and his wife died 8 months ago.
The path next door at the mental health ward
My room at the convent
I was playinging with the affects on the camera
I walked in the labrynth
Spring has come!
A candid shot, it wasn't intentional...
4. I got sick for 2 weeks :(
-I haven't been sick for that long since I was a kid!
5. I wrote a long much needed letter to a few old friends who have mentored me.
Okay now that I have written down those things they don't look that big but honestly those things took up some huge chunks of time.
I can't trust myself, I wonder sometimes why I find some things funny? I'll ask myself what about that do I find so funny? Is it because that person is poking fun at another? Is it because I am making fun of someone or trying to make myself feel more important than that person? Anyway I think emotions are unreliable and hate that I'm a closet emotional person. I would like to conceal my feelings so that not everyone can tell what I'm feeling by the expression on my face. Like when i cry in a movie or when I blush because I feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. My friend Jen use to go so red and I would make fun of her all the time. Then when I got into my 20s I developed the same annoying tendencie (shakes fist at God) Thanks for the Karma God! My Emotions lie to me all the time!